Two Down On The List of Seven

So, yesterday Emily Ann and I went to Wal-mart. and I was able to procure two things from my list.

Lightbulbs? Check! Crockpot? Double-check!

It's small, but it will do.

The crockpot isn’t very big, but it will be nice to have a larger and a small one depending on what I cook, yes?

I did hunt for baskets while at Wall World, but I didn’t find any that were to my satisfaction. I also forgot hangers. I will go basket and hanger hunting tonight at the dollar store and Big Lots that are both close to my work.

You might be thinking, “What? She already has done two things on that list? is she going to have anything to do all seven days?” One item on that list involves several elements and is more like a list of fifty all by itself. So to have two small things done yesterday was very empowering! (Yes, I am motivated by small things. Sad, huh?)

Now, here is an updated version of my list:

7 Things in 7 Days

1. Buy a new crock pot so I can make potato bacon soup. (My old on bit the dust in my last move. ) Task completed 10/5
2. Buy baskets for my room and hangers for my closet. So you know that shelf I bought for my books? Well, as gorgeous as it is, it is a shelving fail. Since I don’t have dresser, I decided to by large baskets to put in the shelf that I could put non-hanging clothes in and use my tubs for a different kind of storage. I also need more hangers for my closet since all my winter clothing has been taken out of storage. (I forgot I had so many sweaters…)
3. Buy lightbulbs. I swear, the lights in my apartment are going out right and left. A couple of days ago my bedroom light blew, and today it was my bathroom lights. I figure I should get a stockpile started, cause it is not fun to walk around my apartment in the dark. Completed 10/5
4. Price rental cars. I don’t have wheels of my own, and if Scott and I decide to take a trip to Park City, this might be the only way to do it.
5. Clean, vacuum, reorganize my room. I will spare you the details… but this really, really needs to be done. Really. Also, I want to move my bed.
6. Finish grocery shopping. I don’t want him to starve to death. (By the way Scott, what do you like to eat? Irene wants to know.)
7. Pick Scott up from the airport. Cause after all that work, I deserve a reward!

A List Of Seven

So, the last time I saw Scott was the middle of August. I was in Sioux Falls, South Dakota and was able to see Scott’s home and visit his church. I also was able see his tiny hometown of Avon, SD and meet his delightful family.  In some ways it seems like a long time ago, but in other ways it doesn’t. The “long time” is going two months without seeing someone you love.

Miss you....

Well, the time is going by, and Scott is set to visit me this time on October 12… that is just Seven More Days Away. That’s right, only! seven!! days!!!

Now, I could do a couple of things during these seven days. I could go ape-crazy for several days and then tie up all the loose ends of stuff I need to get done at the last minute, cause procrastination: that’s how I roll.  Or, I could constructively use my natural enthusiasm and energy (aka hyperactivity) by channeling into a productive mindframe. So, here friends, I will bring you a list. A List o Seven Things To Do In Seven Days.

7 Things in 7 Days

1. Buy a new crock pot so I can make potato bacon soup. (My old on bit the dust in my last move. )
2. Buy baskets for my room and hangers for my closet. So you know that shelf I bought for my books? Well, as gorgeous as it is, it is a shelving fail. Since I don’t have dresser, I decided to by large baskets to put in the shelf that I could put non-hanging clothes in and use my tubs for a different kind of storage. I also need more hangers for my closet since all my winter clothing has been taken out of storage. (I forgot I had so many sweaters…)
3. Buy lightbulbs. I swear, the lights in my apartment are going out right and left. A couple of days ago my bedroom light blew, and today it was my bathroom lights. I figure I should get a stockpile started, cause it is not fun to walk around my apartment in the dark.
4. Price rental cars. I don’t have wheels of my own, and if Scott and I decide to take a trip to Park City, this might be the only way to do it.
5. Clean, vacuum, reorganize my room. I will spare you the details… but this really, really needs to be done. Really. Also, I want to move my bed.
6. Finish grocery shopping. I don’t want him to starve to death. (By the way Scott, what do you like to eat? Irene wants to know.)
7. Pick Scott up from the airport. Cause after all that work, I deserve a reward!

There you have it, my list of seven things to do to keep me accountable with my remaining time. Now that I have a Sweet Camera I can chronicle my progress and you all can keep me accountable… because we all know the purpose of a blog is to keep other people accountable to mediocre goals.  Let the mediocrity preparation begin!

Angela’s Moved Out

One Thursday evening I bounced into my aparment,happily chatting away wit my friend Kristin,  when Angela stepped into my path with these words, “I’m moving.”

Stopping mid-sentence, I told Kristin I’d just heard some vital information. Temporarily providing Angela with my attention, I asked, “You’re what? When?”

Angela was moving to Dallas. Not as a theory, not as a threat, not as a dream, but as a reality. Angela’s company offered her a position as a trainer in Dallas and needed her there October 18th, so she was leaving October 15th

I finished my conversation with Kristin and found the other Emily. All we could do was smile. It was our dream come true.

A bit later, I went back to my room when I overheard Angela crying. I cringed, knowing that I would be escaping the house as much as possible the last 20-ish days she was set to live with me, because seriously, what life change can be drama free with her? I tried to avoid hearing her, but sometimes it can’t be avoided when her speaking volume is piano forte. Angela was on the phone with Rick’s sister, attempting defend her move to be with Rick. In my last post, I mentioned Angela dumped him fifteen years ago for the man who became her first husband. It seems as if Rick’s sister wanted some sort of assurance that this was not going to happen again. Angela was more than happy to provide it. How?

By calling several people and having a conference call with Rick’s sister to “prove her love.”

The first call was Angela’s mother. Her reply to her daughter’s hasty decision to move, “I’m happy for you… for now.” Angela became defensive and said Rick was her true love, and I quote, ‘We will be together for always and forever. Amen.” Angela and her mother went around a few more times when Angela called her father next and announced her reunion with her one true love.

“Well, that’s nice sweetie,” was Angela’s father’s reply. “You have a job, right” Angela explained her promotion and hung up. There was one more call to make: the all important call to Eric to break up with him.

Yes, she broke up with him over the phone. With her new boyfriend’s sister on the line as well. And the phone on speakerphone. I will spare you the ridiculousness of her words and say this… Eric took it well, and Angela attempted to provoke more dramatic responses from him. After this conversation, I’d had my fill. I grabbed my hoodie and took off for Chuck and Irene’s, preparing to hide like this for three more weeks. Angela did me a favor, though. She spared me the drama by moving out much sooner than expected.

Friday morning, I received a text message from my landlord Dolly. “Angela is moving out early. “

“Are you serious?” I replied. “This is even better than Oct 15.” Dolly felt the same way about Angela that Emily Ann and I did.

“This is the 3rd time she has changed her story. First she said she wanted to move because of her grandma being sick. Then it was to be with her long-lost love. Now its because she is so depressed she can’t stand to be here another minute.” Drama much? Dolly and I made plans to show the apartment for Saturday so we could find a replacement roommate faster… or at least be more careful about who was moving in. I floated throughout the rest of the day… my life was going to soon be much simpler.

When I came home that afternoon, Angela was packing. I said hello and we exchanged a few curt words I asked her why she was moving so fast. She told me her job wanted her sooner. I asked about her daughter, how did Katie feel about all of this, now that she wasn’t coming to Colorado Springs. Angela replied that Katie was moving to Dallas next May when school let out. I shrugged my shoulders, and went upstairs to grab some things. Angela didn’t need help packing, so I decided not to be around to indulge her drama. I spent the evening at Chuck and Irene’s again, where I hung out with my friend Josh around the fire pit.  When I came home that night, I found this:

All that was left was her empty room.

I feel like an awful person for saying this, but I was so relieved… Angela was really gone. She left as dramatically as she came, and moved out as swiftly as she moved in. Mercifully, the only word I have received since the move is a rambly voicemail with instructions on what to do with her mail and and a text message with her new phone number, which I immediately erased. When I say I want no contact with her, I mean it.

In other news, my new roommate moved in yesterday morning. She has not displayed any erratic behaviors. Let’s hope it stays that way.

Angela’s Moving On

This blog is going to be a two-parter, since if I write everything that happened in one blog it will be loooong.

It has been a while since I have blogged about Angela, has it? There really wasn’t much to say. Angela broke up with Angel, started dating a really nice truckeer named Eric, found a job with a company named ACS, and started school again. Between her work late afternoons and nights,class during the day, and occasionally going out with friends, she was never here.  And it was wonderful. Here and there she would do things like whine about the apartment and talk about moving to Colorado Springs to be near her daughter, then backpedal and consider maybe if she should go with Eric to North Carolina instead, but that was it.  It was quiet.

Quiet until two weeks ago.

One day Angela was on Facebook, when she received a request from an old friend. This friend, however, wasn’t just any old friend… it was an ex fiance, a man named Rick she’d been engaged to when she was 19.  After Angela hadn’t heard from him for a six month stretch, she left him, only he wasn’t aware of this tidbit. One day,Angela was in the hospital and Rick showed up to see her. By then, Angela (being the rebound queen that she is) was already with the man who would become her first husband. She soundly dumped Rick and didn’t hear from him until this month. Apparently, he has been searching for her for nine years.

My stomach tightened. Only drama could from a reunion like this. Well, at least in her case.

Over the next few days, Angela and Rick were always chatting, whether it be on MSN using a webcam or on the phone. It wasn’t long before Angela and Rick started using the “L” word, which I am pretty sure she throws around like a dish towel, when she said she loved both Angel AND Eric. I kept reminding Angela that she was still technically dating Eric, and she would just blow me off by saying that “Eric never calls me” (lie) and “it’s over between us, Rick and I are meant to be together.” Sure, don’t bother to break up with the nice guy, huh? Well, it didn’t take her long.

Up Next: Angela’s Moving Out

Auntie Em

So I don’thave any kids yet. Neither does my sister. I am a Christian and require that my childbearing be done in the bonds of marriage. To be honest with myself, if my relationship with Scott keeps heading in the direction it appears to be going in, having kids probably only a few short years off, but is it really soon? Not quite.

I have never been a “kid person”. I have done church ministry with kids for years and had a job working with children with autism. This wasn’t so bad… I like the interaction older kids provide. Babies? Not so much. They are so fragile, so needy. I didn’t like holding them, changing them, cleaning up after them… the job was so demanding. But after my friends started having babies, I began to feel my own personal attachment and affection growing for them. So maybe that maternal instinct people have swearing for years I have is kicking in? Maybe.

So back to the fact my sister Sarah and I are childless and I am liking kids more and more. My friends jokingkly started calling me these kiddos “aunt.” Well, hey, I don’t mind adopting this group of kiddos at all!

First off, I want to congratulate my good friend Melinda on the birth of her daughter Emma. Emma was born on Melinda’s birthday, September 22nd. Not only is she healthy, she is darling. I can’t wait to meet her!

Emma Jane

Next up is Avan, who is son to my best friend Jen S. I finally met this baby in July. When I came back in August, he remembered me! Avan is really fun because he is such a happy baby. He is almost always smiling or giggling. When he does fuss or cry, it doesn’t last very long. He is nine months old now, and the next time I see him, he will probably be walking.  Its hard to be away from this little guy. I like Utah, but I would love to watch him grow up.

Avan and Auntie Em at the Iowa State Fair

Some of my buggers are over the age of one,  though the mother of these next two kiddos is baking a bun due this spring.  We don’t know the baby’s gender yet, so I have settled on calling the baby Bradenbelle until we find out. (Its a combination of Braden or Isabelle, which are the names the mother has picked). My other best friend Jenni R is the mother two these litte rascals, Samantha and Gabrielle. If you check out Jenni’s blog, you can read about their exploits. I had the chance to sit for Sami and Gabi almost three years ago, when Gabi was only a few months old. Gabs was a tiny, sweet little baby with the cutest smile. Sami was pretty much a genius. Well, now Gabrielle is a spry, spunky three year old and Sami is a six year old first grader that is still pretty much a genius. I am pretty sure she has more common sense than your average teenager.

Left: Gabrielle. Right: Samantha

Not to be left out is my friend Racheal’s darling daughter Emma Grace (yes another Emma!) Emma is the same age as Gabi and is only a month older. I have never actually met Emma, but I look forward to seeing her in a few short weeks when I am a bridesmaid in her mommy Racheal’s wedding in Indiana November 7th. Here Emma is pictured with her future daddy Jason, who I think will be an amazing father for her.

Left: Emma, Right: Jason

So there you have it, my surrogate neices and nephews that I don’t get to cuddle often enough. Do any of you have special kiddos in your lives? They can be your kids, your friends kids, or relatives kids. Tell me about them!

Crazy Neighbors

My neighbors are nuts.

I have several sets of neighbors, actually. I live in the front of a four-plex unit, so I have a neighbor directly next door to me, one directly behind me, and then one kitty corner to me in the back. Not to mention the other four plexes that round up my cul-de-sac, but the family I am talking about I live directly next to. This family I share a wall with, and I am subjected to their sounds and smells.

I have not been too keen on this particular set of neighbors for a while. They children will be screaming bloody murder at one another during ungodly hours. (Blood curdling cry at 6 am? Check! Hysterical screaming at midnight? Outside your bedroom window? From the six year old? Double check!) The scent of the food this family makes makes it seem as if someone died and lingers in our air longer than curry, driving us to always have a candle or air freshening wall-unit plugged in. It was these neighbors who brought over my morning visitor. If I had a hitlist, I think they would end up somewhere near the top.

So, now what crimes have committed lately? Well, I have two bigger stories but one will have to do for now. It will be enough to make you scratch your hed for the rest of the day.

I was walking home from work, and started up our sidewalk. Just a I was stepping from the street curb to the walkway, I spotted something glinting in the sunlight. There, at my feet, was a knife.

Yes, a knife. A shiny, metal, big kitchen knife great for cutting things and is typically a murder weapon in Mystery Novels type knife.

Unsure, of what to do, I almost left it there. Then I thought of my Crazy Neighbors kids. I think they have like four children (it’s hard to tell, what with all the people milling in and out of that place) so I came to two conclusions: one, the kids could get hurt if they were playing with it, and two… this was most likely their kitchen knife anyway. The children have left random items in odd places in our yard and they do it regularly. (Sometimes they leave this stuff on my front step right where we could trip on it, in the dark…)  Since it wasn’t bloody,it probably wasn’t a murder weapon. I gingerly picked up the knife and knocked on the door. After several knocks, their adorable little girl opened the door, I asked if her mother was home.

“No, ” was her reply.Then she started to reach for the knife in my hand. I quickly held it further away from her, and asked for a grown up. Right about then a car rolled up with a bunch of people in it, one of them being the little girl’s mother. The mother barely speaks English, so one of the fine gentleman in the car (I call them the Burmese Mafia) gave me a sinister look and asked what I was doing there. I explained to him  I found a random knife sitting on the freaking sidewalk and decided to give the knife to an adult so one of the children wouldn’t get hurt. One of the Mafia translated, and the mother nodded. “I’m sorry,” she said, in broken English, and reached out to take the knife. I unlocked my own apartment door, only to receive glares from the Mafia while doing so. Guess that no good deed goes unpunished, hm?

Later that evening, I told Angela about finding a random knife on the sidewalk. Nothing shocks me with these neighbors now, but dude, there was a knife on my sidewalk!

My story was old news to Angela. “Oh, I found it sitting out there before,” she said nonchalantly. “I just left it.”

I am still flabbergasted. Why would someone need a knife in that part of the yard? Did you feel the need to cut some lettuce on the sidewalk? Do some car repairs with a kitchen knife? Honestly, what was the point?

And really, should I be shocked anymore? I have lived here for over a year now. I have witnessed these children leave bikes outside to rust in the snow… Still…  no matter what my neighbors do, leaving a knife on the sidewalk will never be normal.

Makin’ Me Proud

So, my sweetie started Seminary last week. I failed to mention that before regular classes started, he took a class called an “Intensive” for the seminary. An “intensive” is a class that where all the materials are taught within a short time frame, maybe one to two weeks.  The specific intensive Scott had was a prep class. Well, he got his grade back on the intensive.

My man got an A.

Scott, I am so proud of you! This was a great way to start seminary.

Also? One week in, a ridiculous amount of reading… and he is still attentive.

That means a lot to me.

Ladies… you all wish you’re man was as awesome as mine. But you can’t have him…

He is all mine.

Also? Not to brag or anything, but I think he likes it that way, too…

Baby, it feels good to be on the same page.

Seminary Starts

I guess my last post was a false alarm…. I received an e-mail from my pastor advising me the whole matter was a joke.

Heh, some joke.

Anyway, enough of all of that. Today my darling Scott will begin his first regular seminary courses. I am really excited and proud of him. I have confidence he will walk out of his Master’s degree a smarter, stronger, and sharper Christian.

Also, this whole time thing? We will have to work harder.

Scott and I seem to get along so well because we value the same things in a relationship: communication, loyalty, transparency, time investment. For me, I go beyond thriving on it;  I must admit I covet my partner’s time and attention.

Since we starred our “more than  friends” season of our relationship at the beginning of his summer, Scott and I have had lots of unbudgeted time to devote to one another. With it, we were able to get to know one another and grow closer than some people might be able to in our situation. After a small scheduling issue Saturday, Scott and I realized that our quality time was going to be much less spontaneous and more calculated, more structured. My heart felt a dull ache. I have had to do this before, I share my guy with homework. I KNOW Scott doesn’t want to leave me behind in the dust, but there goes that oh-so-familiar fear of wondering if I am going simply have the leftovers of the time. Once Scott and I were off the phone, I realeased my rush of emotion and shed a few tears. I couldn’t help but wonder when I wasn’t going to need to share Scott.

After my tears were shed, I realized a few things. When Scott is in Seminary, he has homework to do. I want to support him in this process, and it would require some sacrifices. That I understood and really, I desire to do so. As I looked at the road ahead, should the Lord deign we stay together, someday Scott will be in pastoral ministry. At that time, I will be sharing Scott with his congregation. As much as I enjoy the work of the ministry, I don’t want to be married to an absent husband. There is nothing in the world that indicates to me this will be a problem, but I wondered if I would have the “not wanting to share” struggle in the future.

Then it hit me. I am sharing Scott now.

Why, of course. I will always be sharing Scott, for he belongs to the Lord.

Was I willing to share Scott with God? Rather, was I able to accept God’s gift of Scott on God’s terms?

My desire for Scott’s time and attention is  not bad… but it can cross the line of covetousness rather easily. Also, he is not completely mine. So in reflection, Seminary is not going to be just a refining process for Scott… it will be one for me as well. The Christian walk demands conformity to Christ. We don’t have to have His personality or His physical appearance, but the indwelling Holy Spirit  molds us after His character. This process, called sanctification, requires that we figurately put tendencies and desires not after the image of Christ to be put to death.

This too must be cruficied, for not only does Scott belong to the Lord Jesus; so do I.

So hopefully, this Seminary career will teach me not only how to love and desire Scott after the character and example of Christ, but how to love God after the character and example of Christ.

What I Thought I Wanted

Tuxedo in the closet, gold band in a box
Two days from the altar she went and called the whole thing off
What he thought he wanted, what he got instead
Leaves him broken and grateful

I passed understanding a long, long time ago
And the simple home of systems and answers we all know
What I thought I wanted, what I got instead
Leaves me broken and somehow peaceful

I keep wanting you to be fair
But that’s not what you said
I want certain answers to these prayers
But that’s not what you said

When I get to heaven I’m gonna go find Job
I want to ask a few hard questions, I want to know what he knows
About what it is he wanted and what he got instead
How to be broken and faithful

What I thought I wanted
What I thought I wanted
What I thought I wanted
What I thought I wanted

Staring in the water like Aesops foolish dog
I can’t help but reflect on what it was I almost lost
What it was I wanted, what I got instead
Leaves me broken and grateful

I’m broken and grateful
I want to be broken and grateful
I want to be broken, peaceful, faithful, grateful, grateful
I want to be broken, peaceful, faithful, grateful, grateful

Sara Groves, 'What I Thought I Wanted'

Over the last year and a half, as I have healed from my greatest heartbreak, this song has taken on a deep meaning for me. Sometimes we have desires the sovereignty of God does not allow us to fulfill.  Such was the case when my engagement ended last year. As certain situations caused me frustration in the aftermath of the breakup, as well as clarity in how I am as a person and who he was as a person,  I have become a thankful woman to God that I did not marry the man I had chosen for myself. In the process, the Lord has shown me the type of person I would best complement and what I needed in a husband myself. God has graciously brought that sort of man in Scott. My brokenness brought submission, and willingness to listen. I learned so many lessons, and I doubt if I could have learned them any other way. The experience was painful, but God knew what He was doing.

I am eternally grateful.

That thankfulness was deepened today when I received an international call from my friend Phil. God has taught me  remarkable lessons that I have often prayed my former fiance would have learned himself. The phone call I received confirmed the opposite. My fiance ended our engagement on the advice of his family. I was never told what the advice was, except I wasn’t the problem and it didn’t concern me. (Never mind the fact I moved across the country on this man’s request, right? Oh yeah, there is also the simple fact I was the other party entering this marriage and doubts were never expressed to me, and it was my future that was being affected as well…) With those words, he packed up his car and moved back in with the parents. While he was there, he met a spry but troubled young woman who he quickly made friends with. Almost as quickly this friendship took on a romantic nature. That romantic nature didn’t last long. He continued to try to help the young woman in her troubled state. After a terse conversation with his family, the young woman expressed no desire to lead a Christian lifestyle though she professed to be one. The advice of his family was to abandon or back off of the relationship.

Last week, that was his intent.

This week, he eloped.

On his facebook page, my former fiance expressed that, yes, it was impulsive, but he thinks this will actually work!

I guess I don’t understand how a person can go from unconditionally accepting your parents advice in your love life to doing the exact opposite.

At the same time, I can’t say I am suprised. All during our relationship, he tried to be an adult. He tried to be stable. In a sense to those around us, it appeared I was trying to make him better. Trying to fix him.

I failed miserably.

I hope that isn’t what he is not trying to do now. Because he will fail miserably.

I don’t want to see him fail miserably. I want to see his new marriage flourish. I have to admit, I wondered what it would take for him to learn the lessons God intended for him to learn. There seems to be this funny trend of me saying that and then a dramatic change occurring in the person’s life I made the statement about. Recently, it has been four times. Seems fishy, doesn’t it?

Staring in the water like Aesops foolish dog
I can’t help but reflect on what it was I almost lost
What it was I wanted, what I got instead
Leaves me broken and grateful

I couldn’t help but look back on all of this. I gave up so much for him. I thought I lost it all. But really, God has blessed me richly. Upon that reflection, I realized that had I married him, I would have been submuissive to that impulsive nature. It would have been a millstone for the rest of my life.

Broken and grateful? Yes, indeed.

Also? Very much in love.  Scott, if only you knew how grateful I am to continually find God has brought me exactly what I asked for…

Nerdy is the New Awesome

IIt is a well-established fact that I am a nerd. I know my friend Christopher has been disputing this fact for years. Since I eschew wearing glasses in favor of contacts, he has decided that instead I have some nerd-like tendencies, primarily my interest in theology. But am I full on nerd? Christopher, I have the thing that is going to put me up over the top.

I am going to a Renaissance Faire.  And I am dressing up.

Yes, my friends, love will make you do crazy things. In September, I am going to Minneapolis to attend the Shakopee Ren Faire with my darling Scott. He goes to this particular faire every year with college friends. Even though the world might find Scott nuts for wearing a kilt in public, a Ren Faire is the one place in the world where I would look truly out of place not in costume next to a guy in a kilt. Since he will be going kilted, I wasn’t going to be outdone and uncostumed.  So, I have been on the hunt for the Ren Faire costume that simply screamed, “Emily!” Know what folks? I found it. Say hello to my sixteenth-century chic.

 

If you like my choice, you can find it or other awesome costumes here.

So, there you are folks.  Tudor Emily. RenEm. Because I? Will make nerdiness stylish. You all wish you could be awesome-nerdy like me.